Familiar faces

When oh when will I get my own phone line? Before I transferred from the other place, I'd already made arrangements for the old line to come here but Malaysian customer service being the way it is, guess what, four weeks on and there's still no news.

But anyways, it's been three weeks since I came back to HTM. I just love being in a hospital. As bad as being on call is, the quietness of the corridors and the sleeping patients (as long as they're not restless or gasping la) calms me. At least I've firmly decided on where I would like to work.

I had said before, during one of my farewell speeches, that whenever I leave a place, I only remember the good stuff. and when I left HTM, I kept missing the good natured ambience that the staff has. I forgot about when I whined about colleagues who took advantage of us junior ones or when it got so busy that I ended up escorting a patient twice in 12 hours. So naturally, the moment I spent my first day, they all come flooding back in a huge tsunami...hehehe.....and long suffering colleagues all rolled their eyes as if to say 'Macam la kau tak pernah kerja sini...'

Not only the staff are familiar, even some patients I still remember and they, in turn still remember me. Two chinese girls and their grandmother and aunt came to see me one day. The last time I saw her, she was this scrawny, pale thing who was stuck on oxygen and her mum. She had been my patient while I was in HRPZ II (formerly HKB) too. and now.....she's still scrawny but she's all grown up! :) Sadly her mother had died about 2 years ago.

Two days ago, my colleague referred a case which had equally saddened and enraged me the first time I met her. She was taken care of by her aunt. Her father, an IVDU had passed away and the first time I met her, the mother had passed away as well. The next I heard, her other two siblings also had died. Tell me, what other types of sadness and grief can you possibly wish on this unfortunate being? A year and half ago at least she was well. I could barely recognise her that day. Her limbs were like matchsticks, her tummy distended and her skin had multiple rashes. She looked exhausted; maybe she had finally given up on fighting for her life.

I've a hunch she might not return to Tanah Merah....and perhaps that is for the best.

It was a cold and rainy day....

The monsoon rain beats heavily on her silver Kenari windshield. The grey clouds mirror the heaviness in her heart. Once in a while she clumsily wipes at the tears flowing on her cheeks.

Why are men so idiotic sometimes? She cries silently. Husbands in particular....! Is it so hard to show your appreciation towards your wife, whether it by words or by actions...? Teasing you may be but the word still smarts.

A muffled sob escapes her lips. She drives slowly pass the silent schools, the small roadside sundry shops and looks for a place she can stop by. She needs a moment to think.

Her phone rings. She glances at the display. Let it ring, her heart says. Serves him right for treating you this way. He's probably calling to admonish you for leaving the house without permission. He probably just wants to tell you off for letting him face the puzzled expressions of his family members, for he, does not know where his wife is. He, who ALWAYS knows where the wife goes. For she does not go anywhere without him.

But that was before. It's time to teach him a lesson. Let him know that he cannot treat her like chewing gum he accidentally stepped on and now wants to get rid off.

The beginnings of a headache throbs in her head. I need to get home. Regardless of how angry I am, I miss him already.

She starts her car and makes a three point turn. The rain still falls but already the clouds look a little less grey to her.

The house is empty. His car isn't parked at it's usual spot. Her heart lunges to her feet and beyond. Sampai hati.... The tears start to fall again. The throbbing becomes more intense. She should really get some sleep. A couple of paracetamols should take care of the pain. Her last thoughts as she dozed off was of him, laughing as he enjoys the weekend lunch at his sister's home. Happy to be rid off her.

Two hours later she wakes up. His arms are wrapped around her, his breath consolingly warm against her neck. She turns around and he opens his eyes. She starts to pull his arm away from her but he resists.

Stop it! Do you know what matters of things have been going through my head the past four hours? Do you know the moment I realised that you'd left, I rushed out to find you that I left my wallet at home and when I got to where I thought you'd be, I still couldn't find you and now the gas tank is empty and I didn't have money to fill it up?

She ponders upon his words, deciding if she should believe him but deep down realises that he has never lied to her so why would he start now?

Do you know how worried I have been, and how sorry I am that I'm such an idiot and please not do that to me again?

She turns to face him. She knows he's telling the truth and that he indeed has gone round and round all the usual spots they frequent, hoping to catch a glimpse of her silver Kenari. She knows that for everything that she thought was bad about him, there are 10 other things that are wonderful about him.

She pulls him close and embraces him. I didn't go far, no matter how mad I am at you, I wouldn't dream of leaving you....I didn't go far. I'm sorry.

Hush, it's ok yang, it's ok. Now come and eat lunch with me, I'm starving.

and that day, she had the best ikan goreng she has ever tasted.....

Rut rut rut

I'm in a rut.

and I don't know how I'm going to get out of it.

Yesterday was my first day back at work. It was nice in a way, starting in a place where you've worked before. Now and then ppl kept stopping and saying things like 'Macam pernah tgk je muka nie...' and I don't resent that. It was nice of them to say that. But I don't think I'll be making myself comfy here. I'd like to advance at some stage.

But most of all, I'd like to get my own house.

With my own things and where I don't have to tread softly everywhere I go and get permission with anything I use.

Bleeuurgh.

I'm back to sharing spaces for just 2 weeks and already I'm resenting it.

and I'm resenting it so much that it's taking a toll with the people around me.

Someone tell me how I should get myself out of this rut...

Overwhelmed

Imagine trying to fit the entire content of a house into a room.

That is precisely what dr bekeng has been attempting to do for the past 2 weeks, bar the few days she had to celebrate raya.

and now she is totally overwhelmed.

She has tried putting some stuff at Ma's house in Pengkalan Chepa. A single seater sofa, the bed, the ironing board, the fan and the TV cabinet resides there now. The TV, on the other hand is currently sitting in a corner of the kitchen at FIL's house, a sad reminder of my currently (proper) homeless state. In her room, she has set up the PC (complete with her printer) AND another TV (albeit a much smaller one) and the DVD player. Some stuff has been replacing older equipments in FIL's house - the fridge, the washing machine, the ASTRO decoder (thank god no more interrupted dialogues!) and SIL will now be getting the microwave oven that used to sit on the kitchen counter because another microwave oven will be sitting there now.

BUT I still have about a tonne of other stuff that seriously needs a new home. What about my books - leisure and medically related-? What about my collection of DVDs? What about my stationeries? I now have two sets of toiletries and my lovely stainless steel, heavy bottomed crockeries are just sitting there in boxes....OUTSIDE, NEXT TO MY CAR......

Sorry, but I did say I'm overwhelmed...............

McDreamy, McSteamy and McVet

Warning, spoilers may be ahead.

I just spent the last 5 hours of my morning cooped up in my small and very messy room watching the complete second season of Grey's Anatomy.

When I watch and get hooked to any TV programmes - which I don't really, not that often - it's usually because I identify with the story and their characters. In this case, obviously it's the medical thing, y'know. I love Cristina and her barb wired comments and over achieving streak. I think I used to be like her before I mellowed down (or is it out? Ntah....). I love Miranda Bailey and her no nonsense attitude, because really we all know she's just a human being under all that talk.

I love watching Burke and Cristina and how they got together despite their major differences and how despite not so obvious gestures, the affection between those two still shine through.

and I love how all the characters gel together, weaving in between those stories that each of their patients tell - making each episodes such a gem and even though now I have completed all 20 odd episodes, it's not satisfying me but just making me hunger for more. I guess good TV series are supposed to do that to you.

GA is really one of those TV watching experience that makes you feel all the human emotions possible. Cristina's one liners always made me laugh till my sides hurt and I got angry that I felt like going into the TV and shaking some sense into Izzie when she fell in love with Denny (but of course, with charm by the bucketfuls, who wouldn't?) and I cried like a baby at so many scenes that I've lost count.

Yeah, it's OTT (ever seen a Katherine Heigl look-alike in your hospitals lately, huh????) and over glamourising the profession but who cares.....it's TV, it's escapism and we all need a little bit of that once in a while.....

Customer service part II

Ho hum, another Raya gone by.

It always seems like the whole of Malaysia's population ends up in Kelantan during the Raya festivities. Mind you, KB is no longer the quiet town it was 20 years ago, but come Raya, the whole state is transformed. Roads get congested, restaurants are full - even Renaissance's ramadhan buffets are fully booked by 8 am in the morning! and strange as it sounds, I can almost always tell which ones are local and those who are just here for the holidays.

Despite the slowly westernizing influences, Kelantan girls are still rarely seen without their tudungs. Though, when I see them in their tight jeans, almost sleeveless, low collared baby Ts, I seriously feel like going up to them and asking "Why do you even bother huh?" - most of them are still reluctant to take the tudungs off. But seriously la weyyy...why bother? The tudungs are either a)ikat mulut itik bawah dagu and so short that they expose the nape of the neck or the skin on the chest or b)all properly tied up but for some strange reason hair is allowed to fall out of the tudungs - most of the time can be seen on motorbikes at kampung roads.

KL girls on the other hand, expose their hair unashamedly, 9 out of 10 hair has been dyed - honey blond is quite popular. In fact this isn't exclusive to the girls, KL makciks also tend to exhibit a hair colour that isn't their own. They also have a different type of walk - maybe it's the air of confidence they naturally obtain from staying in a big city. and of course, the way they speak almost always give it away too. It's the Manglish that I usually can't stand.

But anyhow, me digress. I went to KB Mall on the second day of Raya. There's a new store next to P*ci**c open. So, Abg was looking for a suitable wedding present for a colleague and we were getting desperate. Browsing through the household section, I saw some bean bag covers (though I can't really imagine seeing a bean bag in a typical Kelantan home). My old one had become dirty and covered in mould due to the lack of use but I don't really want to throw the beans away. So I chose one of a neutral colour and proceeded to the cashier. So this guy with a fancy walkie talkie asked me I wanted to pay and when I said yeah, he mumbled into his equipment, I presumed looking for the staff in charge.

Okay, you know me, I'm a stickler for customer service, yeah....if you're already open for business, get someone manning the cashier la weh! The store has been open since 10 and my watch showed 10.20 and you still had to find someone at that time? 10 mins passed by and all I get are a bunch of temps walking in a group in between the aisles, zombie-like and of not much use to me. I was already starting to grumble, in a voice loud enough that the group of temps started to walk away from the vicinity of the paying booth.

After 15 mins of futile waiting, I left. Stupid idiots. Didn't even get my chance to exhibit my bekengness to anyone. If this had happened at Jusco, I'll be heading straight to the customer feedback booth pouring out my discontentment on a piece of their stationery. But the thing is, this sort of thing wouldn't even happen in Jusco in the first place.

You people at KB Mall, yeah, you management people....you can copy the physical aspects of big chain stores all you like, but if your staff is as crappy as they are that day, jgn harap la. I only visit your store because of the lack in choice. If Jusco were to open in KB, jangan harap la nak jumpa muka nie dekat P*ci**c/H*me M*rt ok?

Think that's the end of the story? No way Jose! Later that evening brought the gang out for dinner (tip for future KB Mall visitors, if you're planning to catch up on stories and having a nice conversation with friends, don't bother eating at the shop next to the bowling alley, it was so noisy I can barely hear myself think!) and Abg decided he'd get the Visions set. We chose quickly and queued up to pay. Sebesar-besar second floor of P*ci**c tu, they cleverly opened only one cashier and of course, the slowest, most stupid staff was working that night! After ten mins of waiting, the first customer in line still haven't left! The makcik standing in front of Abg started to get restless. Promoters were starting to pile things up on the counter. Then came this Ah So (supervisor kot) and Abg stopped her in her tracks and said "Tak boleh ke awak bukak counter lain untuk bayar?" - she asked what Abg was paying for and even lifted the box, walking towards the outside of the store where an idle cashier is waiting for people to buy clothes at the longgok section. The next thing I know, the rest of the queue followed us!

Hello! What crap management is this? A thousand of Zings are just waiting to be bombarded but Ah So left quickly, so takde can I nak laser dia.

Okay la, I bukan management oriented but even I can tell that you must be doing something wrong if this is how you manage your store. Why don't you go to other successfull chain stores and see how they do it? I've always enjoyed shopping at Jusco - the staff are so friendly, the advantages of the loyalty card are endless - they even give discounted parking if you're a card holder.

Ini, parking in KB Mall dah la already tak cukup to cater to the post gaji, weekend group - last time I saw, they actually converted the first floor parking to expand the store! Apa punya plan nie? So ppl actually park anywhere they want, blocking already narrow roads and what nots....

My solution? Apart from hoping that Jusco might be interested in opening in KB, be there at 10 am on a saturday morning and leave by 12 noon, saves me the hassle and heart ache and much easier on the blood pressure....

ZINGing....

Bengangnya I hari nieeeeee....!!!!

Kenapa I bengang? Well firstly, I luuuurrrrve the movie You've Got Mail. Tom Hanks isn't really the first guy I'd pick to play a hugely wealthy, highly desired, big boss of a chain of successful bookstores, tapi tak kisah lah tu. There is a part in the movie where Hanks emails Meg Ryan's character about what happened when both characters meet for the second time, where Kathleen finally discovers that Joe Fox is indeed of the Fox and Son's Bookstores.

Joe starts by saying this:
Do you ever feel you've become the worst version of yourself?
That a Pandora's box of all the secret, hateful parts, your arrogance, your spite, your condescension, has sprung open?
Someone provokes you, and instead of smiling and moving on, you ZING them?
"Hello, it's Mr. Nasty."

In this case, Hey there, meet DR Nasty....

Ask my staff, ZINGing is like my favourite pasttime or something. and I almost always regret it, the moment the zings fly out of my mouth and I spend a good portion of the day thinking that maybe I could have handled it better, or become more patient.

*************************I actually started writing about what happened this morning which made me so mad but as I read through my entry, I thought so what.....so what if one silly girl decides that she could feel better by applying sarcasm to me. Yes, I should have handled it better, I guess. I could have had more patience, and acted more maturely. I'll even go as far as admitting that maybe I was asking for it. Tapi if I was perfect, I wouldn't be human pulak, kan......?

So, anyone know where I can buy a barrelful of patience..??

Tiada hala tuju...

Seems most of my friends are making a headstart in the advancement of their careers. Most already have decided what they want to do. Some have taken steps in forms of taking professional exams and joining Masters programme.

The same thing can't be said about yours truly though. Sometimes I think I wanna do Paeds, yet sometimes I think I might make a good lecturer and sometimes, I wish I have the option of retiring and becoming a housewife or something (but naaahhhh, I'll be too bored).

The thing is though, sometimes I feel as if I haven't learned much more than I did when I was a med student (and even THAT is not a lot - believe me when I admit that it was totally luck when I passed medical school). What little I learnt, I think a good portion has been forgotten in between the pages of my Kumar and Clark's Textbook of Medicine. Truth be said, sometimes I think I might even know less stuff now than I did 4 years ago!!

Life in a small KK (Klinik Kesihatan to you) hasn't helped much either. Seeing diabetics and hypertensives and headaches and eczemas and jaundice day in and day out can be quite monotonous that you find yourself feeling so discontented that you start venting it out on your patients.

The fault isn't them. It's me. Could it be that I'm just angry at my procrastinating self; added to that a pinch of envy at seeing how my friends have progressed?

I seriously think true happiness comes from complete contentment. Even if you have only ten ringgit in your wallet, if you're content, who is to say you're not happy, betul?

So tell me....what should I do to feel content again..???

Countdown

It's my last three days at my KK. and frankly, tak rasa nostalgic pun. I definitely will not miss the headache of dealing with staff and patients whom I don't really see as sick.

Hmmm, that did not turn out as well as I thought it in my head.

It's like this. When you're working in an A&E, ppl come to you sick. Sampai sometimes tak leh bangun. This, I can sympathise with. When ppl walk into my room all fine and dandy, this, I cannot register in my thick skull as being sick. OK tak cakap macam tu..?

But anyhow, talking about my line of work, I found this great blog called Dari Bilik Ini - it's written by a GP (from what I gather) and it's sometimes about interesting diseases, and sometimes about the patients that he encounters. Cool. and he's the first runner up of Blogger's Idol 2006!

but anyway, again, dr bekeng digresses. Since I'm off for a long holiday after Raya, we've decided to pack and move stuff this Thursday. So Abg decided that we should spend the few nights here. (Pish, pack apa.....tu dia dok melepak depan tv....:))

Anyhow, I told Abg to settle the termination of api, air and telepon and it turns out they needed my IC since the accounts are in my name.

Masa nak gi fotostat IC, Abg kata 'Nak tgk kedai jual nasi untuk org tak puasa tak? Heeheee, siap tgh tuang nasi lagi...' and it was only 12 noon, ok???!!!

and right in front of the JKR Depot and just a few strides away from Masjid Permaisuri, terang-terangan (walaupun berjerubu) dua tiga lelaki melayu sasa (actually tak la sasa pun, kerempeng aje, tu yang dia beli nasi at 12 noon tu kot) sedang seronok mencedok lauk ke dlm take away styrofoam diorg! and according to Abg, the stall has been open since 10 am!

Okla....bersangka baik all you want....tapi WHO buys food for berbuka at 12 noon???? and I was relaying this story oh-so-enthusiastically to Kak M and kebetulan my patient at that time tu a police officer. Dia siap boleh gelak sakan lagi. According to him, the stall owner already has been reported to Pejabat Agama - tapi obviously no action has been taken lah kan kalau dia masih menjual nasi dia dgn meriahnya!

It's one thing if ppl buy nasi bungkus ala spy buat transaction siap ada code word and disguise kit, but to buy it in the open with absolutely no shame at all?? What is the world coming to? and in Terengganu some more!!??

and what is the district Pejabat Agama doing? Why are you not doing your responsibilities and go tear down the stall or something. I'm sure it's not even built on her own property - macam duduk atas rezab jalan aje...

Tomorrow I will post a pic of this stall ok.....tunggguuuuuu.....

Well, gotta go wake Abg, I can hear his melodic snoring already...:)

Kisah dr bekeng disengat tebuan..

I kena gigit tebuan 2 nights ago. Sakitttt....

Abg and I just had dinner and I was in the kitchen washing up. Then I wanted to straighten up the dining table. Masa nak tolak kerusi tu masuk, i felt this intensely painful and burning sensation in the middle of the palm of my right hand. Memula tu ingatkan masuk duri ke selumbar ke apa but those type of pain goes away and you can usually see the culprit, tapi ini tak nampak apa.

When I returned to the kitchen after I told Abg what I thought had happened, I saw this humongous tebuan (hornet kot...) on the floor.

For an instant, my mind rushed over the possibility of me being allergic to the sting, but then I remember, those are usually with bees....hehehe...melodramatic la plak.

Abg put some gamat oil on the sting but the pain was OMG....there was absolutely NO position that I could put my hands in to relieve the pain. Last-last tried putting it in ice water, - helps a bit but then tangan plak beku.

The throbbing discomfort lasted all night. I kept waking up due to the pain. Abg gelak je when I refused to go to the clinic - 'takut kena cucuk'.

The next day my right hand had swollen up so much that I couldn't make a fist. The pain, still there but much less in intensity, thank god. I called in sick - couldn't drive or write and was too 'mamai' from the lack of sleep....
and then malam semlm, the swollen area got so itchy, rasa macam nak garu ngan berus besi je....

I know I don't want to go through that again so I think I will keep an extra look out for humongous tebuans next time I'm clearing up the kitchen....

Public speaking

I had to give a ceramah today.

Ibu Berisiko semasa Hamil serta Faktor-faktor Kematian Ibu dan Anak.

The thing is, I don't think I have problems speaking in public, yet when I'm up there, all good sense goes out the window and brings a speed train in.

So, I end up talking like one.

But I think today it wasn't too bad. The mothers were nodding to what I was saying, and there wasn't that many expressions of complete puzzlement, so I guess I didn't do too bad.

The one thing that I seriously detest is people talking when someone else is giving a speech. If it was something emergency that simply couldn't wait, takpe la jugak. Once, I was at a conference in Ipoh, the guys (who says being a doctor automatically gives you good manners?) behind me were actually giving a review of how Brazil sucked big time this World Cup just past. Ada ke patut???

Hello brother....kalau kau tak nak dgr ceramah, sudah la, gi keluar la ok....jgn la plak mengganggu konsentrasi org yang nak dengar niee.....

That was what I was tempted to say to him and his gang, tapi of course la buat diam je. But one of these days......

and how is it that I am the one who always ends up sitting next to, or in front of or behind, the yakkety-yakking makciks whom, at that precise moment, chose to share her you-must-try-this biscuit recipe?

and what about people who simply cannot be bothered to switch their phones to silent mode? Takkan la beli phone mahal siap ada camera 7 juta pixel takde silent mode kot? and how is it that these same people, would end up with the most ridiculous, annoying ring tones and proceed to take hours to locate the said phones when they ring?

A productive day

I seriously think, the best days are the ones where you are on leave and everyone else isn't.

I had a day off yesterday. Since I'm reporting to JKN Kelantan today, I really couldn't be bothered to drive for an hour and ten minutes to Permaisuri and then drive for an hour and a half back at the end of the day. Afterall, the other MO is finally back from her induction course, so, let her take care of some of my patients for a change...(pembuliiiii.....:))

I'm weird in the sense that when it's a working day, I often wish for just ten more minutes of sleep, but on my day off, it's get up and go, people..! It's already 6 thirty y'know!!! and off I go doing my errands or gardening or whatever. Yesterday was like that. The moment FIL has gone off menoreh and Abg and BIL has gone for work, I started on my beadwork for about an hour and then started to lay down the rest of the tikar getahs and then went off to the shops to get some staples to tack them down. Berpeluh2, okay...after that, I started on my ayam percik which took a good 2 hours jugak,just to get the santan to thicken nicely.

I really wanted to take pictures of the dish, tapi terlupa la pulak. I haven't made this in ages. When I was studying overseas and residing in Biggart House, I loved making it, much to the delight of the other Malaysian students tapi sejak kahwin nie, rasa macam malas la pulak. and it is quite cumbersome, first you have to boil the chicken pieces in some garlic and ginger and salt. Then the sauce takes about an hour to boil down to the right consistency. Then the process of barbequing it takes about an hour - but I must say, the fact that Abang had seconds and thirds was worth everything....

Me: Apa rasa?

Abg: Sedap.

Me: Boleh buat lagi?

Abg: Bolehhhhh.....

Me: *happy*

a boring entry...

I love blogs. I'm so addicted to blogs that the first thing I do when I'm logged on is to click on all my bookmarked blogs and see if they have any new entries. Yang patheticnya, when I'm on my lunch break and I'm at home, I STILL drop by to see if they have any new entries!! :)

To me, blogs give an insight into other people's lives and how they think. Sometimes I think I should be a psychologist - I just luuurrrrrve analysing what people say and why do they say the things they say. It's like, reality TV but you read instead of you watch. You get me..? :) and as I've said before, I believe that there is a voyeur inside each and everyone of us, and it's because of this trait that reality TV has become so successful today. But apart from a handful of those shows, I'm not really a fan. I've always loved reading. I can't stand having nothing to do so that's why I always have a book with me. I'm the type of person who reads in the toilet and I have a mini library in them!

I spend an average RM200 per month on reading material and I'd rather spend my dosh on books than the latest make up line or clothes (not that I can find many that fit me....Hahahaha..). When I was studying, the place that you'll definitely find me during the weekend is the public library.

In short, take away my TV, take away my chocolate covered digestives, but don't you dare lay your grimy hands on my Harry Potter collection! :)

But I digress - so anyhow, I think my blog is rather boring compared to the others that I've read. I love reading about Zetty's antics as she goes about her life, juggling work and family. She has a fantastic comedic (is that even a proper word? Sounds like something that grows on your face) sense about her. Her entries (apart from the recent ones about the loss in her life) almost always make me laugh out loud. RotiKacangMerah talks so sweetly about her husband and how they enjoy life together. Her cats are cute too!

Blogs add an extra bit of oomph in my other wise hum drum life. I will be sorry if/when my work gets a bit more hectic, that I won't have such pleasures anymore.

Here's to blogs and freedom of expression and the voyeurs in all of us! :)

A period of change

Yeay, my transfer has been finalised...!!

My FMS told me that my transfer letter has finally been sent and I am to report to Jabatan Kesihatan Negeri Kelantan on the 2nd October. Yeay! Tapi sedih pun ada...

Life is a bit hectic what with fasting month coming soon, and me having to transfer stuff to the other half of the house so that the contractor will be able to complete renovation works by the beginning of Ramadhan...

FIL came with a lorry today to get some stuff away. Mostly the large stuff - my sofa (pleeeeease la don't smudge my lovely cream sofa okay......), the divan and the headboard (which has been rendered useless since we've been sleeping on the mattress, on the floor in front of the tv) and a wardrobe which has only been collecting dust in the master bedroom. Talking about that, I think from now on, I won't be needing wardrobes for my clothes. I'll just get those racks with wheels on, that you can hang clothes from. Kinda like the ones you see in supermarkets.

All you need are tons and tons of hangers. Easy peasy. Angkat je baju, just hang them on. No clutter, no folding (letih wo, lipat kain...:)). Yes, it won't look nice, but who'll see anyway, kan....

Had a weird day at the office this morning. I have a patient who has had 8 or maybe 9 kids already and currently at 32 weeks gestation. She's been complaining of contractions for the past one week and had just been discharged from the hospital in KT the day before.

This morning, she was rushed in, claiming she wants to 'teran' already. So my nurse pun kelam kabut put on her apron and got ready all her stuff to deliver this anticipated premature baby.

Put her in position, rupa2nya benda yang dia nak teran tu rupanya her vaginal wall prolapse! Even when my staff nurse dah 'relocated' it, she still insists that she wants to push. Walhal os is closed! Adduuuiii.....tension i..and this patient, when she's in between pregnancy, totally refuses contraception, that my nurses told me that at one time they had to chase her around the kampung to give her the Depo injection.

I'm not against having children. I tell my patients, kalau awak mampu dari segi zahir dan mampu bertanggungjawab pada anak2 awak, saya tak kisah awak nak berdozen2 anak pun. Tapi kalau anak berderet2 sampai awak tak cukup makan, selalu letih, anak sekolah keciciran, itu kah cara yang terbaik untuk menjaga amanah Allah ni? Memang betul tiap2 anak ada rezeki masing2 tapi rezeki tu masih perlu dicari. Bukan duduk saja di rumah pun masuk duit.....I think some of them go home and tell their husbands what I said, they must be thinking dr suriana is teaching wives to go against their husbands!!! :) :)

People-watching

Do you love to watch people like I do?

When I go out to places - hotels, shopping malls, hospitals, pasar malams - I tend to observe people. I love seeing kids and how easily they can make friends; one minute they are shyly peeking from behind mummy's skirt, one minute later they are holding hands and running all over the place. I love watching the mummies, often with a small one, chatting with other mummies about how Danish is just so 'buas' and how Qistina just loves playing with her lipstick.

I watch the dating couples - some so brazen, hands in each other's pockets and bodies so close together I can't tell which is which; and some so coy, they were walking about a feet apart.

I see the Politeknik students walk by. Boys, usually, in a group of 6-10 of them. T-shirts 1 size too small, thick rimmed plastic frames (which are usually non prescription glasses) and hair spiked in all directions. Not to forget the metal dog chain hung nonchalantly from the back trouser pocket to the front trouser pocket.

But most of all, people who line up for food are the ones that amuse me the most. I hate going to hotel buffets, mainly because I then become the hateful, laser mouthed me. What is it about free food that makes us monsters?

The first in line usually heap food like there's no tomorrow. And they take EVERYTHING. Prawns are usually very popular. Once they finish with the main dish counter, off they went again, this time heading to the dessert station and the process starts all over again. I tell you, I've seen some people actually trying to pull off the sugar decoration from the dessert table!

Me and Abg just love to watch and 'mengumpat' these people. Kiasu sungguh. And y'know what's the worst thing? They usually take a few mouthfuls and push the plate aside. Hello!!!!!! Ada org kebuluran, tau tak? Kat Malaysia pun ada org makan siput babi and you membazir makanan!

Why why why???? Just because you paid RM100 for your buffet, doesn't mean you can waste you know. Just take a little bit, actually put the food in your mouth and if you feel like having more, get up and take seconds la.....aiyo.

We used to love frequenting buffets (well, the only one worth going in KB for the fasting month is Renaissance and that isn't so great, but it's only RM55, so, fairlah...) but we figured, if RM20 is more than enough to get both of us food for both berbuka AND sahur, then we might as well stay at home and save our pahalas from being given to all those people that we are busily badmouthing...hehe...

Seperti kucing kehilangan anak...

Little kitty stayed with us that night - when Abg came home, it unashamedly went to bug Abg and menggesel2 ke kaki Abang and totally ignored me. Jeles saya! :)

Fed her chicken pieces and then left it to sleep outside.

The next morning it was still there, waiting for me to open the door and let it in. As I got ready for work, she was playing with the stuff that I have all over my floor. She looked so adorable...and I'm sure Abg won't object to me keeping her.

I left her at the porch this morning as I left for work and when I came back for lunch, she was nowhere to be seen....:(

Even later that evening, whenever I would hear a cat miaowing, I'd jump and run to the door, hoping it'd be my little kitty.....apa nak buat, takde jodoh jadi kucing I la tu....As I said to Abg, 'macam hilang anak'.

The first cat I remember us (my family) having was a mongrel persian. We named her Parsen because she looked like a 'kucing Parsi' but not really. Parsen had a bad case of cat sinusitis and early in the morning, she'd sneeze and sneeze, just like my Ma before she had her op. Parsen was a model cat. Even when she was hungry, she'd never steal anything from the kitchen table. Whenever we'd bathe her, Parsen would never make a fuss, even when we shaped her long fur into mohawks..:) and would sit still when we were blow drying her.

She stayed with us the longest before she suddenly disappeared one day. Ma said maybe she went away somewhere else to die.

Later on we accumulated all sort of cats; all strays but still beautiful nevertheless and they all had their own sweet and sometimes naughty personality. Ponstan (yes, the painkiller) was the 'I-couldn't-care-less' type of cat. Brutal was as brutal looking as his name suggests. Mary and Harry came next. At one stage, Ma even named her kitten after a Cantonese drama serial character, I think! There were numerous others but I can't remember since I wasn't at home much those times.

But we would never forget Ma's favourite cat - Deeque. He was a short haired ginger. Nothing special but he was soooo manja and could never resist whenever Ma is reading the newspaper, Deeque would be jumping up and down, often would be sidling up to Ma's face to kiss her.

If Ma was sitting on the footstool watching TV, Deeque would climb unto her lap and sit among the folds of her housecoat, sort of being in a hammock. Come meal times, whatever his escapades are, Deeque would be running back whenever he'd hear Ma call his name.

I think Ma never recovered from Deeque's passing. Someone put out poison - we weren't sure if it was meant for rats and Deeque mistook it for food - and Deeque was found in the drain. We all cried that day.

After Deeque, Ma decided she wouldn't keep any more pet cats. I think she didn't want to run the risk of being hurt as she gets easily attached to her pets.

I guess when I found little black kitty under my silver Kenari, I was secretly hoping for my own little Deeque.

Here kitty kitty

Hectic day today. Pemeriksaan bakal haji is well underway and I've been trying slowly and surely to finish my 105 bakal hajis. Can't fit too many, as I'm worried about how my counter/registration staff is going to cope, what with the usual number of regular patients. I've gone through about 50-60 of them and the other clinics have yet to start. They all takpe la, ada 23 and 51 org aje....can finish in one go.

Anyway, I was the last person to leave the clinic as usual and found a lovely 'surprise' snoozing underneath the shade of my silver Kenari. The small black kitty wouldn't budge even when I started the engine and I didn't want to risk running over it as I drove out. So I very graciously (NOT) went on all fours and scooped it away.

For a split second I wanted to leave it there. I'm sure it belonged to either Kak K or Kak Yah's ever growing clan of cats, but it looked so adorable and soooo cute...


So, as I am writing this, the yet unnamed kitty is currently snoozing by my feet. I have no idea what I'm going to feed him tonight or where he's going to sleep. and furthermore, where am I leaving it when I leave for courses or FIL's house?

But I really really really wanna keep ittt.............!!!!!

Bila Abang Meredah Hujan

Di suatu petang, hujan turun lebat sekali. Dia menunggu dan menunggu hujan reda. Tempias hujan makin membasahi lantai porch klinik. Dia buntu. Di tangan kanannya, segugus kunci; untuk keretanya yg terletak cuma 100m tapi dihalangi hujan yang masih terus mencurah-curah. Di tangan kirinya, telefon bimbit yang hampir ditinggalkan di rumah tapi disuruh oleh Abang untuk dibawa - takut ada apa-apa nanti.

"Abang.....Abangggg.....!"

"Huh, apa dia?"

"Tak leh balikkkkk....hujannnnn....."

"Hahahaha...habis tu?"

"Marila amik Yanaaaaa.....amik payung, lepas tu kita balik ngan kereta...boleh ek?"

"Ish....takde kerja...."

"Alaaa....mai aaa. Kejap je...."

So Abang dan payung ungunya, berseluar pendeknya, berselipar orennya, meredah hujan lebat, meredah lopak air semata-mata untuk mengambil isterinya pulang.

Not a Siti related post, folks!

I will NOT write about Siti.

I will NOT write about Siti.



I wonder if my blog has any purpose? I see it as a place to let off some steam. I love to talk, yet I think some people might find me hard to digest. I tend to see things in a different perspective; one of the traits of an Aquarian, I guess. Here, I can write what I want and I don't have to worry if people get me or not, cos I don't really care...haha!

Which is why I am (most of the time...hehe) thankful that I somehow managed to find Abang among alllllll those people in the world. I mean, how lucky am I? To find the one person who seem to see things MY way. Yes, he has his own opinion, yet he respects me enough to accept my views too.

so Abg, yes, I might throw a temper tantrum now and again. Yes, I might stomp around when I see you snoozing in front of the TV when I have to cook in my lousy kitchen. Tapi, when you go and fry fish for dinner, slice onions for my favourite kuah kicap, and serve dinner, hati ini sejukkkkk kembali.

I love you Abang....