Do you know what I love most about cats?
They don't dwell.
Cats don't have the ability to sit and mope and feel sorry for themselves. Have you noticed that? A cat maybe limping with a sprained joint or a broken bone, but do you see it just sitting there? No, a cat will limp away and get on with its life.
Doremon is one of the siblings whom I brought home from a bus stop in PC. When they first entered our lives, they were about three months old. Doremon was the smallest and had diarrhoea. But he held on and is now a big strapping cat.
He injured his left eye a few months back. I'm not sure what happened but one day he came back, his left eye swollen and had some bloody discharge. Now he has a cloudy eye. Have I ever seen him mope and lose his appetite and just sit there lamenting his luck? Nosirree. Doremon just went on and out running all over the place as if nothing had happened.
Meme is one of the many cats I have rescued from the hospital. When I first met Meme, she was ill and her ears were encrusted with skin infection. It took me about 2 weeks before I could bring Meme home, but I think she was destined to be part of my family.
Meme must have injured her right hindleg at some point. When she sits, her right leg goes out because she has lost the ability to bend it at the joint. When other cats sit with their hindlegs close together, Meme sits in an almost 'terkangkang' manner. But does Meme let that fact hinder her from chasing Che'Ruru and Che'lan all over the place? Noooo, of course not. In fact Meme is one of the fastest sprinter of the lot.
Last week we noticed that Butam had refused to put his right front leg on the ground. He must have sprained it while playing around in the cage. He wanted so much to run around with the other bigger cats but for a few days he could only hobble along on his three good legs. When he was in the cage, I saw him climb into the litter tray and then fell face first unto the sand because his front leg couldn't be used to get his balance.
Like any other cat lover, my heart went out to him but I don't think Butam was feeling sorry for himself.
I wish I could be more like cats.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Monday, October 27, 2008
Weeping..
I am oncall today. The wind is howling relentlessly outside the window. I can hear the raindrops spattering against the glass.
I think about the baby lying in the infant resuscitation room in the labour room downstairs and I begin to weep quietly inside as I have wept openly just now.
I wonder how the parents are doing. I am sure devastation is an understatement. To have waited for 9 months only to have your hopes and dreams shattered in an instant; I cannot even begin to imagine.
I wonder if the infant is feeling pain as he struggles for each breath, increasingly exhausted with every hour that passes.
People perceive doctors as life-savers, miracle-workers even, but the honest truth is we are just God's helpers and at times we are forced to make painful, life-changing decisions such as the one I just did on the little one downstairs whose heart is beating forcefully outside his chest.
The truth is we are just pawns in Mother Nature's game of life, and sometimes she can be a little bit cruel.
I think about the baby lying in the infant resuscitation room in the labour room downstairs and I begin to weep quietly inside as I have wept openly just now.
I wonder how the parents are doing. I am sure devastation is an understatement. To have waited for 9 months only to have your hopes and dreams shattered in an instant; I cannot even begin to imagine.
I wonder if the infant is feeling pain as he struggles for each breath, increasingly exhausted with every hour that passes.
People perceive doctors as life-savers, miracle-workers even, but the honest truth is we are just God's helpers and at times we are forced to make painful, life-changing decisions such as the one I just did on the little one downstairs whose heart is beating forcefully outside his chest.
The truth is we are just pawns in Mother Nature's game of life, and sometimes she can be a little bit cruel.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Saturday, October 18, 2008
Mish Mash and everything thrown in
I
There is a quiet satisfaction seeing all of my Abg's work clothes lined up in the closet all ironed and nice and ready to wear. I've just realised that all his clothes are either tan, white or a shade of blue. Must do something about that.
II
Cats are getting a new furniture next week. Was browsing through the net when I found this:
Apparently it's a reject item from the online store and they are selling it cheap because it has a defect at the opening of the 'penthouse'. I think normally it would probably be selling about RM70-RM80 but I am getting it for less than RM45 plus postage! What a steal!
III
Cari.com.my has been redoing their forums and have been busy translating their board titles from English to Malay. Apparently "Preconception, Pregnancy and Postnatal" is "Pratanggapan, Kehamilan dan Post-Natal". They have translated "Repair and Troubleshooting" as "Baiki dan Pencarisilapan".
Hmm. Is PENCARISILAPAN a real word?
IV
Yesterday was masak-masak day. I dragged Abg to the nearest supermarket to get some ingredients and this was the result.
Puding Rainbow Blackmore
Ingredients:
26g of powder jelly. Apparently a pack is 13g. The alternative is one packet of 37.5 gram of stringy agar-agar.
8 medium sized eggs.
420g sugar. - The original recipe said this was too sweet so I reduced it to 400g but it was a little too 'tawar' to pass off as a desert so I say, stick to 420g.
130g butter
2 tablespoon custard powder
1 tin of evaporated milk (susu cair, of which Ideal is the most commonly seen brand) - I used the large tin
1350ml of water
1 tsp vanilla
2 tbsp cocoa powder - mix with some water to dilute
Food colouring.
First - boil the agar-agar with the water and sugar. If you think the agar2 is taking a long time to dissolve, don't worry, it will once the mixture has come to a boil. But if there's still some floating around, do sieve them out. Put aside.
Then mix the eggs, custard powder and milk in a bowl.
Add the egg mixture into the boiled agar-agar and bring to boil once more.
Add vanilla and butter. Make sure the butter has dissolved before turning off the heat.
Divide the mix into three. Add the cocoa into one. Put red and green colouring into the other two.
You must work relatively quickly from this point onwards as the agar-agar mix will start to harden.
Take a 9'x9' baking tray (about 3 inch deep) and place one side on a book or something so that it is lying on an incline. The layering is probably best illustrated by the following piccies, courtesy of MakLang from Cari.com.my.
I used coffee instead of cocoa and the extra sweetness would have been welcomed to counter the bitterness. But it turned out well and for once I now know the exact measurement of water to make my agar-agar!
This is my version.
There is a quiet satisfaction seeing all of my Abg's work clothes lined up in the closet all ironed and nice and ready to wear. I've just realised that all his clothes are either tan, white or a shade of blue. Must do something about that.
II
Cats are getting a new furniture next week. Was browsing through the net when I found this:
Apparently it's a reject item from the online store and they are selling it cheap because it has a defect at the opening of the 'penthouse'. I think normally it would probably be selling about RM70-RM80 but I am getting it for less than RM45 plus postage! What a steal!
III
Cari.com.my has been redoing their forums and have been busy translating their board titles from English to Malay. Apparently "Preconception, Pregnancy and Postnatal" is "Pratanggapan, Kehamilan dan Post-Natal". They have translated "Repair and Troubleshooting" as "Baiki dan Pencarisilapan".
Hmm. Is PENCARISILAPAN a real word?
IV
Yesterday was masak-masak day. I dragged Abg to the nearest supermarket to get some ingredients and this was the result.
Puding Rainbow Blackmore
Ingredients:
26g of powder jelly. Apparently a pack is 13g. The alternative is one packet of 37.5 gram of stringy agar-agar.
8 medium sized eggs.
420g sugar. - The original recipe said this was too sweet so I reduced it to 400g but it was a little too 'tawar' to pass off as a desert so I say, stick to 420g.
130g butter
2 tablespoon custard powder
1 tin of evaporated milk (susu cair, of which Ideal is the most commonly seen brand) - I used the large tin
1350ml of water
1 tsp vanilla
2 tbsp cocoa powder - mix with some water to dilute
Food colouring.
First - boil the agar-agar with the water and sugar. If you think the agar2 is taking a long time to dissolve, don't worry, it will once the mixture has come to a boil. But if there's still some floating around, do sieve them out. Put aside.
Then mix the eggs, custard powder and milk in a bowl.
Add the egg mixture into the boiled agar-agar and bring to boil once more.
Add vanilla and butter. Make sure the butter has dissolved before turning off the heat.
Divide the mix into three. Add the cocoa into one. Put red and green colouring into the other two.
You must work relatively quickly from this point onwards as the agar-agar mix will start to harden.
Take a 9'x9' baking tray (about 3 inch deep) and place one side on a book or something so that it is lying on an incline. The layering is probably best illustrated by the following piccies, courtesy of MakLang from Cari.com.my.
I used coffee instead of cocoa and the extra sweetness would have been welcomed to counter the bitterness. But it turned out well and for once I now know the exact measurement of water to make my agar-agar!
This is my version.
Friday, October 10, 2008
Musings on a Friday afternoon...
Have you ever wondered that maybe you have chosen the wrong path in life?
Do you ever think that if you had chosen to be something other than what you are today, that maybe you might end up being brilliant at it, rather than just mediocre?
I know that what I am now is based on the choices I made in the past and that nothing I do now can change what has happened before, so I might as well make the best out of it.
I read once in the newspaper while I was studying overseas, about this guy who used to have a high flying job as a lawyer, (I think) or maybe he was a doctor. He made a drastic decision to quit his job and became, a cab driver. He swears that he is much happier now.
Apparently hunky yummy actor Gerard Butler used to be a lawyer but then if anyone is as hunky and yummy as Gerard Butler, I reckon he should be shared anyway.
But I digress - so, the past few days I have been sighing and wallowing in deep thoughts about what I should do with my life. Oh, for the freedom that unending supply of money would give you! I would quit my job and start a cat boarding business, perhaps.
Sigh.
Do you ever think that if you had chosen to be something other than what you are today, that maybe you might end up being brilliant at it, rather than just mediocre?
I know that what I am now is based on the choices I made in the past and that nothing I do now can change what has happened before, so I might as well make the best out of it.
I read once in the newspaper while I was studying overseas, about this guy who used to have a high flying job as a lawyer, (I think) or maybe he was a doctor. He made a drastic decision to quit his job and became, a cab driver. He swears that he is much happier now.
Apparently hunky yummy actor Gerard Butler used to be a lawyer but then if anyone is as hunky and yummy as Gerard Butler, I reckon he should be shared anyway.
But I digress - so, the past few days I have been sighing and wallowing in deep thoughts about what I should do with my life. Oh, for the freedom that unending supply of money would give you! I would quit my job and start a cat boarding business, perhaps.
Sigh.
Kitty update
Bureng at two weeks plus.
Bureng yesterday - during the rare times when she is able to sit still.
I love kittens at this stage. They are so curious and so - hoppity. They run all over the place chasing anything big that moves.
They are also learning to pounce and wrestle with each other and sometimes with the other bigger cats too!
Tuesday, October 07, 2008
Gone in three days
I went home post call on the second day of Raya greeted by a very sick Che'We. Che'We had been looking under the weather for the past fortnight already and nothing I do seems to be working. I am afterall, limited by the vet services in Kelantan. I hear vets in KL even take bloods for workup.
and on top of that, the black baby also looked a bit 'moyok'.
Che'We was abandoned at our house by Abg's kind cousin. I don't know, maybe she thought I had opened a cat shelter or something.
Che'We during healthier times.
Nevertheless, we took him in. He and Che'Mot became friends as they were the two youngest at that time. I had taken Che'Mot from the hospital's labour room a week or two prior to that.
Che'We and Che'Mot.
Che'Mot had always been the sickly type. Despite giving him the best food and supplements, he never looked well. His belly was always distended and once he got so sick we thought, sure die one lah - but he pulled through and even looked like he was going to live a long prosperous life.
But Che'Mot and Che'We never fully recovered from the flu that all my cats had after I brought Ruru home. They were constantly sniffling and sneezing green snot on the floor and in the cages.
Stokin.
About a week before their deaths, Stokin also became unwell. It didn't help that they were all unvaccinated at that time.
I took black kitty with his sibling and mummy cat from the hospital.
Anyway, Che'We went first. Abg actually thought he was sleeping by the dustbin.
The next morning I found the black kitty all cold on the floor of the cage. I called up the vet assistant and asked her if I could leave Che'Mot and Stokin at her place as I was leaving for KL. I knew Stokin will not last the day if left at home and I didn't want to give up just yet.
However, the next day I got a call saying Stokin had passed away during the night and when I arrived on Monday, she then told me that Che'Mot didn't survive also.
So, that's it - 4 kittens gone in a space of three days.
and on top of that, the black baby also looked a bit 'moyok'.
Che'We was abandoned at our house by Abg's kind cousin. I don't know, maybe she thought I had opened a cat shelter or something.
Che'We during healthier times.
Nevertheless, we took him in. He and Che'Mot became friends as they were the two youngest at that time. I had taken Che'Mot from the hospital's labour room a week or two prior to that.
Che'We and Che'Mot.
Che'Mot had always been the sickly type. Despite giving him the best food and supplements, he never looked well. His belly was always distended and once he got so sick we thought, sure die one lah - but he pulled through and even looked like he was going to live a long prosperous life.
But Che'Mot and Che'We never fully recovered from the flu that all my cats had after I brought Ruru home. They were constantly sniffling and sneezing green snot on the floor and in the cages.
Stokin.
About a week before their deaths, Stokin also became unwell. It didn't help that they were all unvaccinated at that time.
I took black kitty with his sibling and mummy cat from the hospital.
Anyway, Che'We went first. Abg actually thought he was sleeping by the dustbin.
The next morning I found the black kitty all cold on the floor of the cage. I called up the vet assistant and asked her if I could leave Che'Mot and Stokin at her place as I was leaving for KL. I knew Stokin will not last the day if left at home and I didn't want to give up just yet.
However, the next day I got a call saying Stokin had passed away during the night and when I arrived on Monday, she then told me that Che'Mot didn't survive also.
So, that's it - 4 kittens gone in a space of three days.
Knock knock..
Sometimes I think I would make a wonderful housewife.
Seriously.
At times when I am off from work, all I can think of is waking up early in the morning, prepare breakfast for Abg and when he is off, will get down to cleaning and what nots. I was still on leave today and had purposely returned home early as I was already imagining how greasy the kitchen floor is, how haphazardly-arranged my plates are and the smudginess of the glasstop of my dining table.
After arriving home yesterday, I got down to gathering my clothes to be washed and then straightening up the kitchen. The cage which had held my now dead kittens needed to be scrubbed with dettol. It is now sitting in a corner, a sad reminder of the short lives of my 4 kids.
This morning I woke up bright and early (how puzzling it is that I will always wait till the very last minute to wake up on a working day yet have no problem jumping out of bed on my day off?) and cooked fried rice for the hubby, folded the mats outside where the womenfolk were doing 'ketupats' pre Raya, brushed the cement floor and then mopped the living area. I actually took the trouble to move my three seater out of the way so I could mop UNDERNEATH it as opposed to just mopping around it.
My FIL actually had some freshly cooked rice and vege soup for lunch today. and as I am typing this, I am trying to decide whether I should be doing the ironing or make over the wet kitchen with the left over linoleum mats.
Yes, I know. I sound nuts.
But crazy as I sound, there is a satisfaction in seeing my house clean and my floors shining and smelling nice. When I go shopping, I am entranced by all the fancy floor cleaners and latest design of mops and high tech mopping cloth. I bought this mop recently and it has cut the amount of time I used to spend cleaning the kitchen area by half!
Lately I have been wondering if all the hassle at work is worth it. I am fast losing my already scanty faith in the human nature. I had mentioned to a friend recently that there must be something wrong with me that I tolerate my cats better than I tolerate human beings!
It used to be a niggling feeling only but it's been more persistant nowadays, this feeling that I am having. How how how laaaa....?
Seriously.
At times when I am off from work, all I can think of is waking up early in the morning, prepare breakfast for Abg and when he is off, will get down to cleaning and what nots. I was still on leave today and had purposely returned home early as I was already imagining how greasy the kitchen floor is, how haphazardly-arranged my plates are and the smudginess of the glasstop of my dining table.
After arriving home yesterday, I got down to gathering my clothes to be washed and then straightening up the kitchen. The cage which had held my now dead kittens needed to be scrubbed with dettol. It is now sitting in a corner, a sad reminder of the short lives of my 4 kids.
This morning I woke up bright and early (how puzzling it is that I will always wait till the very last minute to wake up on a working day yet have no problem jumping out of bed on my day off?) and cooked fried rice for the hubby, folded the mats outside where the womenfolk were doing 'ketupats' pre Raya, brushed the cement floor and then mopped the living area. I actually took the trouble to move my three seater out of the way so I could mop UNDERNEATH it as opposed to just mopping around it.
My FIL actually had some freshly cooked rice and vege soup for lunch today. and as I am typing this, I am trying to decide whether I should be doing the ironing or make over the wet kitchen with the left over linoleum mats.
Yes, I know. I sound nuts.
But crazy as I sound, there is a satisfaction in seeing my house clean and my floors shining and smelling nice. When I go shopping, I am entranced by all the fancy floor cleaners and latest design of mops and high tech mopping cloth. I bought this mop recently and it has cut the amount of time I used to spend cleaning the kitchen area by half!
Lately I have been wondering if all the hassle at work is worth it. I am fast losing my already scanty faith in the human nature. I had mentioned to a friend recently that there must be something wrong with me that I tolerate my cats better than I tolerate human beings!
It used to be a niggling feeling only but it's been more persistant nowadays, this feeling that I am having. How how how laaaa....?
Thursday, October 02, 2008
My Raya rant
It is official. People here are crazy.
You must be crazy if you waited for 5 days, even drove all the way from the north to the east coast with your child having fever and then came to our casualty along with all the other crazy people and decided to go home when the doctor have advised your child to be admitted and then, decided to come at 12 midnight for admission!
You must be crazy if your child is 10 days old and you claim she has been having fever for the past 10 days yet when we wanted to take some blood, you refused to do so.
You must be crazy if you kept an abscess for four days and then came on the one day when all other clinics are closed for the festivities.
You must be crazy if you have had a headache for 4 days and couldn't sleep yet you came on a public holiday requesting to be admitted.
You must be crazy if you have registered with 30 other patients and you expect to be called within the next 5 mins and when you weren't you kept pestering my staff 'lambat lagi ke?' - yes, we are having a food fest and warm baths inside here instead of running all over the place trying to resuscitate babies and setting lines. Some were even crazier so as to have the balls to come inside and CHECK if there are vacant beds and perhaps we were purposely making you wait.
The theme of the day was children with fever and abdominal pain with loose stool. Yes, if you have been fasting during the day for the past month and then decided that you will gorge yourself with all the variety of food possible, of course your stomach will protest! Aiyohh.....
It is now half 2 in the morning and finally all the crazy people have subsided. For the moment, that is.
Selamat Hari Raya everyone.
p/s: of course by this post I am not calling my patients crazy. It's just my feeble attempt at making light of the situation I am in. Deep down, I really do enjoy having them come after having one week of fever or three weeks of poor oral intake and being dry as Sahara. Seriously.
You must be crazy if you waited for 5 days, even drove all the way from the north to the east coast with your child having fever and then came to our casualty along with all the other crazy people and decided to go home when the doctor have advised your child to be admitted and then, decided to come at 12 midnight for admission!
You must be crazy if your child is 10 days old and you claim she has been having fever for the past 10 days yet when we wanted to take some blood, you refused to do so.
You must be crazy if you kept an abscess for four days and then came on the one day when all other clinics are closed for the festivities.
You must be crazy if you have had a headache for 4 days and couldn't sleep yet you came on a public holiday requesting to be admitted.
You must be crazy if you have registered with 30 other patients and you expect to be called within the next 5 mins and when you weren't you kept pestering my staff 'lambat lagi ke?' - yes, we are having a food fest and warm baths inside here instead of running all over the place trying to resuscitate babies and setting lines. Some were even crazier so as to have the balls to come inside and CHECK if there are vacant beds and perhaps we were purposely making you wait.
The theme of the day was children with fever and abdominal pain with loose stool. Yes, if you have been fasting during the day for the past month and then decided that you will gorge yourself with all the variety of food possible, of course your stomach will protest! Aiyohh.....
It is now half 2 in the morning and finally all the crazy people have subsided. For the moment, that is.
Selamat Hari Raya everyone.
p/s: of course by this post I am not calling my patients crazy. It's just my feeble attempt at making light of the situation I am in. Deep down, I really do enjoy having them come after having one week of fever or three weeks of poor oral intake and being dry as Sahara. Seriously.
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Dearest Abg,
I've no doubt you will be reading this because when you think I am asleep, I see you reading my blog but somehow you will never say anything about the things I write. Consider this as part of my Raya gift for you this year. Though, I'm not really sure what the other part will consist of.
Thank you for wanting to spend the rest of your life with me. As you know, I am not an optimist and I do realise that other things may happen but as for now, for you to even decide 4 years+ ago that I am good enough for you to bear day in and day out is something I sometimes fail to comprehend. Heck, at times, I do not wish to be me!
Thank you for not minding when I am too lazy to iron your work clothes and too lazy to fold the mounting heap of laundry that you end up doing them instead. I know other husbands will give their wives a hard time but you do not. I do not take it for granted but daily I remind myself to do my best and berate myself often that my best isn't good enough. It is seriously tiring to come home post call and still be super wife and with this I salute those who do it (without BIBIK, okeyyyyy).
Thank you for putting up with my bordering-on-obsessive interest in rescuing every abandoned cat I see. When previously you might take a nap after coming home from work, now will have to be spent scooping clumps of poopoo and changing their water and kibbles. I love most sitting next to you watching the cats jump and run round around happily or when they brush their fur against our legs.
Thank you for never raising your voice to me no matter how exasperated you are with your wife's behaviour. I admit sometimes I go too far, wanting to test if your patience has any borders. So far it does not and I never want to see whether it has. Even when I get mad at you, it does not mean that I love you less.
Thank you for driving back to my parents house and never grumbling about it. Thank you for treating my siblings like your own when I have failed to do the same to yours. You know I do but I just show it poorly. Thank you for joining in our family activities and never once making it known that you're wishing you were back with your own.
Thank you for never making me feel bad about the way I look. I know I am not the most beautiful but you have never made me feel ugly.
Thank you for putting up my towel to dry everytime I am done with my shower. Thank you for warming up my car before I go to work. Thank you for ironing my tudung when I am running late. Thank you for all the small things that you do that you may not think is significant but it's these small things that I remember the most.
Thank you for being you.
Thank you for wanting to spend the rest of your life with me. As you know, I am not an optimist and I do realise that other things may happen but as for now, for you to even decide 4 years+ ago that I am good enough for you to bear day in and day out is something I sometimes fail to comprehend. Heck, at times, I do not wish to be me!
Thank you for not minding when I am too lazy to iron your work clothes and too lazy to fold the mounting heap of laundry that you end up doing them instead. I know other husbands will give their wives a hard time but you do not. I do not take it for granted but daily I remind myself to do my best and berate myself often that my best isn't good enough. It is seriously tiring to come home post call and still be super wife and with this I salute those who do it (without BIBIK, okeyyyyy).
Thank you for putting up with my bordering-on-obsessive interest in rescuing every abandoned cat I see. When previously you might take a nap after coming home from work, now will have to be spent scooping clumps of poopoo and changing their water and kibbles. I love most sitting next to you watching the cats jump and run round around happily or when they brush their fur against our legs.
Thank you for never raising your voice to me no matter how exasperated you are with your wife's behaviour. I admit sometimes I go too far, wanting to test if your patience has any borders. So far it does not and I never want to see whether it has. Even when I get mad at you, it does not mean that I love you less.
Thank you for driving back to my parents house and never grumbling about it. Thank you for treating my siblings like your own when I have failed to do the same to yours. You know I do but I just show it poorly. Thank you for joining in our family activities and never once making it known that you're wishing you were back with your own.
Thank you for never making me feel bad about the way I look. I know I am not the most beautiful but you have never made me feel ugly.
Thank you for putting up my towel to dry everytime I am done with my shower. Thank you for warming up my car before I go to work. Thank you for ironing my tudung when I am running late. Thank you for all the small things that you do that you may not think is significant but it's these small things that I remember the most.
Thank you for being you.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Threatened Insanity
I think, one of my biggest fault is that I tend to speak before I weigh the pros and cons of what I am going to say. That, on top of my temper, is just a recipe for disaster.
Once a month, my oncall will be a 'jonah' one. I suppose I should be thankful that I'm not 'jonah' all the time, yes?
Last night was one of those. Cases keep trickling in till 3 am. When I have settled that, the labour room would be calling. It was one of those days when the cases aren't severely ill but warrants a careful review nonetheless.
One of the things that irks me the most is non emergency cases coming at ridiculous hours of the night. Take the case of menorrhagia who came in at 2 am last night. I had just returned to the casualty at 3 am after referring a case from the labour room for suspicious CTG and was looking forward to some shut eye. I asked my nurse why the patient in bed 2 had come in for? Imagine my dismay when she told me that she came in complaining of PV (per vaginal) bleeding since EIGHT days ago. The worst thing is, she has had this happen several times before and is undergoing follow up with the Gynae clinic.
Many a times I have chided my patients for keeping their diabetic foot for weeks before turning up at the casualty on a weekend and almost always near midnight. Or the case of end stage renal failure who would always default her appointment for readmission to ward and turn up severely short of breath due to the extra fluid in her lungs. Not to mention pakciks with swollen scrotum who had ignored his appointment to see the surgeon because he 'felt well' and turn up with abdominal pain and vomiting.
Sigh.
It is now half six in the morning and I am not looking forward to working without any sleep for the past 24 hours. But tis life and it shall go on. Ho hum.
Once a month, my oncall will be a 'jonah' one. I suppose I should be thankful that I'm not 'jonah' all the time, yes?
Last night was one of those. Cases keep trickling in till 3 am. When I have settled that, the labour room would be calling. It was one of those days when the cases aren't severely ill but warrants a careful review nonetheless.
One of the things that irks me the most is non emergency cases coming at ridiculous hours of the night. Take the case of menorrhagia who came in at 2 am last night. I had just returned to the casualty at 3 am after referring a case from the labour room for suspicious CTG and was looking forward to some shut eye. I asked my nurse why the patient in bed 2 had come in for? Imagine my dismay when she told me that she came in complaining of PV (per vaginal) bleeding since EIGHT days ago. The worst thing is, she has had this happen several times before and is undergoing follow up with the Gynae clinic.
Many a times I have chided my patients for keeping their diabetic foot for weeks before turning up at the casualty on a weekend and almost always near midnight. Or the case of end stage renal failure who would always default her appointment for readmission to ward and turn up severely short of breath due to the extra fluid in her lungs. Not to mention pakciks with swollen scrotum who had ignored his appointment to see the surgeon because he 'felt well' and turn up with abdominal pain and vomiting.
Sigh.
It is now half six in the morning and I am not looking forward to working without any sleep for the past 24 hours. But tis life and it shall go on. Ho hum.
Friday, September 19, 2008
Why.....
....is it that usually sedentary humans, most of the time of the female species, feel compelled to make cookies when it comes to Hari Raya? Yours truly included, of course...
The new additions are thriving well. Poor mummy cat isn't feeling so happy though. She is now officially caged till the kittens are about a month old when she will be spayed.
I've lined them up for a family snapshot but the moment I reach for my digicam, ini yang jadi....
The cutest and most active of the gang.
Yes, I know I look adorable.
I'm racking my brains for names. Someone suggested, since they are offsprings of Bubu, why not give them names with "Bu" in them? I quite like this idea. For instance, the tortoise shell above, I could call her Bureng, perhaps, for 'celoreng'...
and this one, the black one, I could call Butam - for Bu + hiTAM.
The other yellow-white kitten I will most likely call Junior or maybe Buju (for Bubu = JUnior) but the last one requires some thinking over. Lil kitty has a short stump of a tail - ekor kontot, in malay. Does that mean I will now have to call it BuNTOT.....?
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Oncall ramblings
Everytime I start an oncall shift, whether it is the half day or the full day variety, there are certain taboos that I adhere to.
First I always imagine having the worst, the busiest and most jonah shift. In that way, if it does turn out to be that way, at least I have been prepared mentally.
Second, when I am still on my shift, I NEVER comment on how it is going. For instance, if Abg calls me up and asks, "Sibuk?" - I say "Tak mau ckp" (I don't want to say). A bit like not wanting to tempt fate. Ask me the next morning and I'll happily give a full report but never before the clock reaches 8.
It has been a hellish day so far. Even my partner has not been spared. Furthermore, an ill peadiatrics case that was supposed to be referred for close observation, had been misunderstood by me for 'close observation HERE'. As expected, the baby deteriorated. Trying to resuscitate a baby at 6 pm on a fasting day is not an experience I would like to repeat.
It's now just past 10pm and I finally get some time to sit. There is a stray kitten mewing outside and he is adorable! But Abg has finally put his foot down and said no. Abg is more a YES man so it is kinda nice when he says NO to me once in a while. But not too often, okay Yang.....hehe.
Ah well, 10 more hours to go.
First I always imagine having the worst, the busiest and most jonah shift. In that way, if it does turn out to be that way, at least I have been prepared mentally.
Second, when I am still on my shift, I NEVER comment on how it is going. For instance, if Abg calls me up and asks, "Sibuk?" - I say "Tak mau ckp" (I don't want to say). A bit like not wanting to tempt fate. Ask me the next morning and I'll happily give a full report but never before the clock reaches 8.
It has been a hellish day so far. Even my partner has not been spared. Furthermore, an ill peadiatrics case that was supposed to be referred for close observation, had been misunderstood by me for 'close observation HERE'. As expected, the baby deteriorated. Trying to resuscitate a baby at 6 pm on a fasting day is not an experience I would like to repeat.
It's now just past 10pm and I finally get some time to sit. There is a stray kitten mewing outside and he is adorable! But Abg has finally put his foot down and said no. Abg is more a YES man so it is kinda nice when he says NO to me once in a while. But not too often, okay Yang.....hehe.
Ah well, 10 more hours to go.
Friday, September 12, 2008
A leisurely fasting afternoon....
We had the house to ourselves this afternoon.
We were told there was going to be an interruption in the electricity supply starting from 9 am and possibly till 6 in the evening. Thankfully, electricity was restored at about 11. I proceeded to give my kids' cages a good scrub and a mini make over.
When Abg returned from Friday prayers, he suggested we drive to Jerteh. Why, you may ask? Well, when I was working in Setiu, one of my staff nurses mentioned a certain stall in Jerteh selling 'ayam pusing' (I think they are known as ayam golek in the west coast) and the 'ayam pusing's sold here are supposedly so delicious and so popular that most of its patrons book their chickens early in the mornings and the chickens are usually sold out way before 5 pm.
True enough, the first time we went, we were disappointed as there were no more chickens left! and it was barely past 5pm.
But the first time we bit into its juicy flesh, we knew all the hype about them were justified. The spices are there just to tingle your tastebuds but not too overpowering. The flesh literally comes away from the skin and melts in your mouth.
It is with this memory lingering in my mind that we left home for our >50km journey to Jerteh, Terengganu. If you can't grasp the significance (or the ridiculousness, haha), imagine driving from Batu Caves to Putrajaya (on your day off) just to get hold of a chicken.
I love taking drives with Abg.
The stall sits almost unnoticeably under the Jerteh bridge. In fact, there are no other stalls there. When we first got to know about this, I think the fowls were selling for RM15 per chicken (already marginally more expensive than other 'ayam pusing's) and this year they were going for RM19 and RM20 per piece!
The best 'ayam pusing' ever.
After getting 'buka puasa' sorted out, we decided to take a leisurely drive to Kuala Besut and check out the fish market at Tok Bali.
View from the bridge somewhere in Pasir Puteh, I think. Haha.
View of the other side of the bridge.
They've built a proper market in Tok Bali. Right on the riverbanks. Actually, I wanted to take pictures of lithe young fishermen hauling in the day's catches but I guess a solitary cat wandering near the jetty will just have to make do.
Do click on piccies for better images.
We were told there was going to be an interruption in the electricity supply starting from 9 am and possibly till 6 in the evening. Thankfully, electricity was restored at about 11. I proceeded to give my kids' cages a good scrub and a mini make over.
When Abg returned from Friday prayers, he suggested we drive to Jerteh. Why, you may ask? Well, when I was working in Setiu, one of my staff nurses mentioned a certain stall in Jerteh selling 'ayam pusing' (I think they are known as ayam golek in the west coast) and the 'ayam pusing's sold here are supposedly so delicious and so popular that most of its patrons book their chickens early in the mornings and the chickens are usually sold out way before 5 pm.
True enough, the first time we went, we were disappointed as there were no more chickens left! and it was barely past 5pm.
But the first time we bit into its juicy flesh, we knew all the hype about them were justified. The spices are there just to tingle your tastebuds but not too overpowering. The flesh literally comes away from the skin and melts in your mouth.
It is with this memory lingering in my mind that we left home for our >50km journey to Jerteh, Terengganu. If you can't grasp the significance (or the ridiculousness, haha), imagine driving from Batu Caves to Putrajaya (on your day off) just to get hold of a chicken.
I love taking drives with Abg.
The stall sits almost unnoticeably under the Jerteh bridge. In fact, there are no other stalls there. When we first got to know about this, I think the fowls were selling for RM15 per chicken (already marginally more expensive than other 'ayam pusing's) and this year they were going for RM19 and RM20 per piece!
The best 'ayam pusing' ever.
After getting 'buka puasa' sorted out, we decided to take a leisurely drive to Kuala Besut and check out the fish market at Tok Bali.
View from the bridge somewhere in Pasir Puteh, I think. Haha.
View of the other side of the bridge.
They've built a proper market in Tok Bali. Right on the riverbanks. Actually, I wanted to take pictures of lithe young fishermen hauling in the day's catches but I guess a solitary cat wandering near the jetty will just have to make do.
Do click on piccies for better images.
Kitty update!
The mummy cat which I brought home from the hospital along with her two kittens (the black and the orange one) has given birth last week!
Last Thursday morning, we were preparing for sahur and lo and behold mummy cat had already completed delivering her 4 kittens.
Two of the kittens had similar colourings as Bubu (the daddy cat; Bubu your absence is missed daily...), one is a tortie and the other completely black.
Takde kerja lain melainkan makan dan tido.
Ini anak kucing ke apa nie...?? Hahaha...
Wrong way little kitty!!
Bubu junior
Other than that, the little white kitten which was the sole survivor of the three siblings has also passed away a few days ago.
Sadly, I was not able to save any of them.
Everytime a kitten I rescue dies, I want to make myself promise to never bring anymore home. When they are too little when they are separated from mummy cat, their bodies lack the natural immunity that the mummy milk provides so most of the time, they usually don't survive if they get an infection while awaiting their 2 month old vaccination. I try my best, but I am racked with guilt every time a kitten dies; it's as if I have failed them.
The other kitten I took from the hospital's canteen - we are calling her 'kurap tinger' for the moment - is also doing well. We call her that because when I first found her, both of her ear flaps were covered by scaly 'kurap'. I first met her while doing rounds and my first attempt at bringing her home was foiled when she ran away. I kept looking for her and she even turned up in one of the wards while I was doing my on call, but it was only about 2 weeks later that I picked her up as she was begging for food at the canteen.
Ever so sweet and manja.
She is lovely now - not a hint of 'kurap' on her ears, thanks to a jab we got at the vet - but still needs some fattening up. She is half the weight of my other cats. At first, the other cats gave her a hard time and shunned her, being the newbie but she seems to be doing better now. She still can't give up her life as a stray though - most of my cats don't wander too far from home even after being let out of the cages - and often would explore the surrounding territories and spend the night outside.
How many now, do I hear you ask? Nineteen, the last time I counted.......okay, will definitely stop now.......
Last Thursday morning, we were preparing for sahur and lo and behold mummy cat had already completed delivering her 4 kittens.
Two of the kittens had similar colourings as Bubu (the daddy cat; Bubu your absence is missed daily...), one is a tortie and the other completely black.
Takde kerja lain melainkan makan dan tido.
Ini anak kucing ke apa nie...?? Hahaha...
Wrong way little kitty!!
Bubu junior
Other than that, the little white kitten which was the sole survivor of the three siblings has also passed away a few days ago.
Sadly, I was not able to save any of them.
Everytime a kitten I rescue dies, I want to make myself promise to never bring anymore home. When they are too little when they are separated from mummy cat, their bodies lack the natural immunity that the mummy milk provides so most of the time, they usually don't survive if they get an infection while awaiting their 2 month old vaccination. I try my best, but I am racked with guilt every time a kitten dies; it's as if I have failed them.
The other kitten I took from the hospital's canteen - we are calling her 'kurap tinger' for the moment - is also doing well. We call her that because when I first found her, both of her ear flaps were covered by scaly 'kurap'. I first met her while doing rounds and my first attempt at bringing her home was foiled when she ran away. I kept looking for her and she even turned up in one of the wards while I was doing my on call, but it was only about 2 weeks later that I picked her up as she was begging for food at the canteen.
Ever so sweet and manja.
She is lovely now - not a hint of 'kurap' on her ears, thanks to a jab we got at the vet - but still needs some fattening up. She is half the weight of my other cats. At first, the other cats gave her a hard time and shunned her, being the newbie but she seems to be doing better now. She still can't give up her life as a stray though - most of my cats don't wander too far from home even after being let out of the cages - and often would explore the surrounding territories and spend the night outside.
How many now, do I hear you ask? Nineteen, the last time I counted.......okay, will definitely stop now.......
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Nothing in particular
I am returning to work tomorrow after a week's break. Yup, a WEEK! Well, I had a course in IMR for two days but still, not working! Have been lepaking at home with Ma and starting a new beading project on sis Yaya's dress for the akad ceremony.
Missed my furkids and was glad to see the little one alive and well when we went to pick him up from boarding.
FYI, rescued three siblings from the hospital's car park two weeks ago. Barely a month old - who would be so heartless as to abandon such young kittens mummy-less. Kalau ye pun, tunggu la besar sikit. The two white-black kittens died despite me bringing them during my oncall just so that I might be able to feed them milk, so only the off-white little one is left. Though, I'm not really sure what colour he really is because of the badly infected fur. Not to mention his constantly wet backside from his diarrhoea.
Yet, I am optimistic. He is eating the softened kibbles well and is rather active. I tried putting him with the other small-ish kitten but he ended up being bulliedand scratched at. Sigh.
Spent the last day of the Merdeka weekend shifting the cats' cages to the back. Abg has roofed off the section at the back next to the wet kitchen. At least it won't be so hot during the mornings and the living area and the room in front wouldn't be getting whiffs of the peepee and poopoo of my kids. Best of all, I can open my window and check on them whenever I like.
As usual, spent a bomb in KL - mostly on cat food. Only bought one new handbag - and it's 70% off - I'm rather proud of myself.
and it's the first day of the fasting month tomorrow! Selamat berpuasa everyone!
Missed my furkids and was glad to see the little one alive and well when we went to pick him up from boarding.
FYI, rescued three siblings from the hospital's car park two weeks ago. Barely a month old - who would be so heartless as to abandon such young kittens mummy-less. Kalau ye pun, tunggu la besar sikit. The two white-black kittens died despite me bringing them during my oncall just so that I might be able to feed them milk, so only the off-white little one is left. Though, I'm not really sure what colour he really is because of the badly infected fur. Not to mention his constantly wet backside from his diarrhoea.
Yet, I am optimistic. He is eating the softened kibbles well and is rather active. I tried putting him with the other small-ish kitten but he ended up being bulliedand scratched at. Sigh.
Spent the last day of the Merdeka weekend shifting the cats' cages to the back. Abg has roofed off the section at the back next to the wet kitchen. At least it won't be so hot during the mornings and the living area and the room in front wouldn't be getting whiffs of the peepee and poopoo of my kids. Best of all, I can open my window and check on them whenever I like.
As usual, spent a bomb in KL - mostly on cat food. Only bought one new handbag - and it's 70% off - I'm rather proud of myself.
and it's the first day of the fasting month tomorrow! Selamat berpuasa everyone!
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Each of my cat has a story...
and this is Jimi's.
Jimi is the only cat in my household that I didn't 'rescue'. The owner of the eating place that Abg frequents offered him to Abg. I still remember the day Abg brought Jimi home. Abg had just pulled into the parking area and I thought was taking a long time to come over. When I looked over, Abg beckoned at me excitedly and told me to look under the seat.
This fluffy ball of white fur was sitting there, so quietly and didn't make a sound as I pulled it out. I remember feeling so sorry for him, being taken away from his home and forced to live with strangers; instead of leaving him in the cage, I put him in a box in the room.
Imagine my surprise when in my sleep that night, I reached over in between my pillow and Abg's and felt something mushy. Safe to say, Jimi sleeps in the cage from that night onwards.
Jimi is the 'samseng' of the group; he is unafraid of anything. He would be the only one to nonchalantly walk out of the house compounds unto the road and once, jump unto the paddy field across the road. I still remember watching this white fur jumping in and out the green grass chasing grasshoppers.
I was in a cheery mood this morning as I walked into the vet. When the vet assistant told me the bad news, all I could focus on was seeing his unmoving body. He was already cold. I hope his passing was painless.
In a way, I could feel how ridiculous all this sounds, yet my furkids are like a part of the family. Each of my cats have their own personality and the loss of each one leaves a void that can never be replaced.
Rest in peace my little one. You will be missed.
Jimi is the only cat in my household that I didn't 'rescue'. The owner of the eating place that Abg frequents offered him to Abg. I still remember the day Abg brought Jimi home. Abg had just pulled into the parking area and I thought was taking a long time to come over. When I looked over, Abg beckoned at me excitedly and told me to look under the seat.
This fluffy ball of white fur was sitting there, so quietly and didn't make a sound as I pulled it out. I remember feeling so sorry for him, being taken away from his home and forced to live with strangers; instead of leaving him in the cage, I put him in a box in the room.
Imagine my surprise when in my sleep that night, I reached over in between my pillow and Abg's and felt something mushy. Safe to say, Jimi sleeps in the cage from that night onwards.
Jimi is the 'samseng' of the group; he is unafraid of anything. He would be the only one to nonchalantly walk out of the house compounds unto the road and once, jump unto the paddy field across the road. I still remember watching this white fur jumping in and out the green grass chasing grasshoppers.
I was in a cheery mood this morning as I walked into the vet. When the vet assistant told me the bad news, all I could focus on was seeing his unmoving body. He was already cold. I hope his passing was painless.
In a way, I could feel how ridiculous all this sounds, yet my furkids are like a part of the family. Each of my cats have their own personality and the loss of each one leaves a void that can never be replaced.
Rest in peace my little one. You will be missed.
Monday, August 18, 2008
Bercelaru....
My furkid Jimi has been knocked down and run over. He is now at the vet, being put on drip and awaiting for op tomorrow, that is, if the vet decides that his injury is worth being operated on.
He is pale as sheet, and refuses to eat nor drink and can only lift up his head to look at me when I call his name.
I cried at the vet as she showed me the extent of his injury and I cried as I left him and I am crying still.
He is pale as sheet, and refuses to eat nor drink and can only lift up his head to look at me when I call his name.
I cried at the vet as she showed me the extent of his injury and I cried as I left him and I am crying still.
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Rotten
Have you ever hated the version of you that you have become? One moment you are loving everything, content with life and all that you have achieved, and gradually you are resenting everything?
Sometimes don't you just wish life is like a Magna Doodle/Etch-A-Sketch board that you can just erase with one swipe of its handle; letting you start fresh, hoping you won't make the same mistake again?
I'm not sure whether this is just a phase I am going through (if it's a phase, shouldn't it be temporary?) or if the previous me is totally gone, replaced by this super bitch that I feel I am now? I bite and growl at my nurses, I don't call up Ma to chat anymore (and I think she is 'merajuk' with me) and even Abg is not spared.
In short, if I were not me, I would HATE me.
Should I be relieved that at least I realise that there is something wrong and must change immediately? Is that my silver lining in this mess of muck that I currently feel like I'm swimming in?
I am looking for faults, something lacking in my life that is causing this but I'm not sure if I'm looking for one just so that I might justify my rotten behaviour or if I don't find one, I might have to resign to the fact that I am, just plain ...rotten?
Thursday, August 07, 2008
Apparently I am 'payoh bbaso'.....
I have been writing this blog with a lot more care lately that it has lost a lot of its anonymity. I know some of my work colleagues read it and it's even in the histories/cookies list in the PC at the casualty.
Work politics is a weird complicated thing. I try not to get my head too wrapped up in it. As far as I am concerned, my first duty is to my immediate boss and to my patients. and as far as I am aware, I have never considered myself to be 'difficult' and note the quote unquote as you and I both know, 'difficult' can mean a lot of things to different people.
Yes, I am Ms Laser Mouth and at times IDIOT is my favourite word but when it comes to colleagues asking for favours, I think I don't usually make a fuss about it. I DO though, have an issue helping out people who do. I mean, if you are going to go beating about the bush and making excuses, do you think other people will be accommodating to you? So, when I give you a taste of your own medicine, don't go running to mummy and moan about how 'payoh bbaso' I am.
Apparently, my boss has told me that Big Boss has informed him that it has come to her attention that I am 'payah bbaso' and doesn't help out other MOs. Okay, you tell me about when I cover for my other colleague who has no partner to cover for her. You tell me about any time when the MAs call me to review Ortho cases and I say no. You tell me about the time when I had stayed back late and ended up escorting a case to HRPZ when the 2nd call has already gone on an earlier trip. You tell me about the time when a colleague messaged me to cover for him and I had to endure multiple 'Why not..' questions from my boss on why his partner can't cover for him instead.
I am tempted to put up an open letter at the MO notice board and issue a challenge to any particular MO who have been whining about me and tell it to my face, that is if you have the balls lah....or else, Abg offered another tempting option: go to Big Boss and say, if you think I'm such a non team player and difficult to work with; I've already handed in my application for transfer A YEAR ago, why don't you just let me go and be rid of me?
Geram geram geram.
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