Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Of working till dusk and wrinkly clothes

Yesterday I spent 12 hours at the hospital. Working.

I left home at half six, arrived at work and punched in at about 7 and only punched out at 7 that evening.

It's been three days in a row when I have driven home in my OT clothes, simply because after finishing our cases, I just couldn't be bothered to change back into my work clothes. I now have a feet high heap of OT clothes on the floor of my bedroom.

Don't get me wrong, I love being in the OT. There's just something about the sensation of the suture needle piercing the skin and seeing your knot opposing the wound that just relaxes me. I love the crisp feel of the scrub and the quiet sigh of the sterile cloth that we drape on the patients. I'm weird, I know. I blame it on my star sign; I'm an Aquarian and we're supposed to be weird.

But, my household have suffered as a result of me coming home late everyday. Two basketful of clothes are waiting to be ironed and hung. Don't even get me started on my bathroom floor! Tsk. I can't even imagine people with kids coping without help. By the time I get home, usually near dusk, I'm already too exhausted and my feet are sore from standing so much while doing the cases. At least I have the liberty of not cooking dinner if I don't feel like eating and there aren't kids to bathe and feed.

So, if I am already so exhausted just working in a small district hospital with specialists, tell me how am I supposed to cope with joining a Masters programme?

and THAT is something that I will ramble on later when I have the energy to do so.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Things to do when you are sick

I am at home sick today.

Urgh.

It used to be that I get sick once a year and would last for maybe 2-3 days. Now, it's 2-3 times a year and lasts about a week. I've had this cold since Thursday, been on call with a cold, had a clinic with a cold and the lack of rest has resulted in a temperature of 38 last night.

Double urgh.

Anyway, I was feeling sorry for myself this morning and ended up watching Oprah. She was having a 'Pay It Forward' campaign where she gave everyone $1000 and urged them to give it away. So this morning's show was about what everyone did with their money.

One story had me sobbing like a kid. There's just something about seeing people do good or animals that turn me to jelly.

One member of the audience advertised in a local newspaper asking people to write in and nominate someone whom they thought deserved the money.

So one first grade teacher wrote in about Alferd (yes, his name is spelt that way), who is 68 and comes to her class. Yes, Alferd is the oldest student in her class.

Alferd is the oldest of his 9 siblings and he never went to school because he had to take care of his brothers and sisters. So, at 68, he decided that he wanted to learn to read. Now he can read first grade books.

So this teacher's letter won and they used the money to buy Alferd books so that he could read to his heart's content.

I've always thought that we tend to take things for granted. Being able to read, ride an escalator, order KFC without looking at the menu, having a colour TV - but here is a 68 year old who could have easily gone through his golden years not being able to read (he has gone through 7 decades safely without the ability) yet he took the effort to approach someone and asked to be taught.

That put my flu into perspective, somehow.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Snippets of a holiday


Welcome to Jakarta....!



View from our room in Cikini.



Bronze elephant in front of the National Museum.



The chaos that is Tanah Abang shopping area.



What Malaysians love about Tanah Abang.



Very informative cartoon on buying food in Tanah Abang market.



Set ikan gurame bakar.



MONAS - Monumen Nasional



Writings on the bust of Husni Thamrin.



What I managed to catch of Senayan City before I was told taking pictures is prohibited. Hehe. Nice mall though.

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Of substance

Sometimes I wish I could write great things. Things that make people think and things that teaches people and change lives. All my blog does is serve as a platform for me to rant about my work and my mundane life.

Though I hope mine is a tad more interesting than the ones who give a complete description of what he did and what he ate bla bla. I prefer blogs which give an insight on what people are thinking and what makes him/her do whatever it is that they do.

Jaded as I am, as I trawl through this massive cyberworld, all I seem to come across are mindless youths, whom, when asked about a memorable quote from a film, would volunteer "You've got to move it, move it" from Madagascar. Maybe it is the generation gap, but come on....!

I stumbled upon this blog after someone in the forum pasted his article on "Why do we get married?".

Below is an extract:

Satu soalan paling kontroversi: Kenapa kita perlu berkahwin?

Jawapannya: Untuk memenuhi fitrah manusia yang mahukan seks. Ini hakikat. Sigmund Freud mengatakan ini dalam istilah saintifik dipanggil sebagai 'libido', iaitu kemahuan paling dalam dan tersembunyi dalam diri manusia yang dipanggil 'id'. Pemikiran manusia secara dasarnya dibahagi kepada tiga: id,ego dan super-ego.

Id adalah kehendak yang paling asas seperti makan, minum, pergi jumpa Encik Tan untuk pelaburan*(ini ke tandas), dan seks juga tidak terkecuali. Seks adalah satu aktiviti pembiakan kalau dalam bahasa saintifik, untuk terus mengekalkan speisis untuk terus berkembang. Dalam kes kita, homo-sapiens.

Ego adalah peraturan yang kita sendiri cipta untuk mengawal kemahuan id kita. Ini seperti prinsip hidup dan kepercayaan diri sendiri. Manakala super-ego adalah undang-undang yang dicipta oleh negara atau agama atau adat untuk mengawal kemahuan id kita.

Jadi dalam kes seks, itu adalah id kita, dan super-ego (agama) melarang kita melakukan seks kecuali apabila berkahwin. Manakala ego kita pula ialah kita malu kalau masyarakat tahu yang kita lakukan seks sebelum kahwin.

Bearing in mind what I usually come across, here is a malay male youth, freshly graduated who has actually read Freud!

So I spent a few hours reading his entries. At one glance people might brush him off as an angry rebellious young thing who has decided to blame everyone and everything around him but read a little deeper and you will discover an intelligent, well read and most importantly passionate person. and what passion he has!

He constantly states his dislike of our current education system, who seems to produce regurgitators than thinkers. Which is something I can relate to.

A few days ago, radio Era had a mini competition for parents to win an opportunity for their kids to go on air. One parent, when asked which of the following is a famous equation - E=mc(squared) and E=my, confidently gave the wrong answer. Another parent couldn't give the correct scientific formula for water.

Is it me? Am I sounding a teensy bit snobbish because 'of course la you cannot expect to remember something you learn in school ten years ago' or 'of course la you think it's easy, you did science in high school' but - seriously?

Maybe what is really worrying me is that, these same parents could have easily told you who the last winner of One in A Million or Akademi Fantasia. Whose home is filled with Media Hiburan, URTV and Mangga.

I digress.

To me, he is an example of what a well rounded Malaysian youth should be. Sure, he has radical opinions, but most importantly, he actually has one! In a world where we are surrounded by 'Tidak apa' attitude, here is a young man who is passionate in what he believes in.

and reading his blog showed me that there are more like him and it gives me hope.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Is it me or....

Is it me, or do other people think the following is weird, not to mention inappropriate?

A man, having a conversation with an unrelated female, whom is not his wife and saying, "I wonder what you look like pregnant?"

or is it just me?

Monday, June 08, 2009

Restlessness

Why is it that I always come up with interesting things to say/write about when I am away from the computer yet when I am sitting here, it never appears? Maybe I should hang a pen and notepad from my neck so that I can jot it down each time a brilliant idea comes about.

It is of course, on call day and it has been pretty quiet. My partner has warned me to keep my 'mulut celupar' shut...hehe. I've also been called a worry wort, which I admit to being one. I can't help worrying about the most severe, and unmanageable cases which don't exist....if that sentence makes any sense.


I think there is something wrong with me.

Seriously.

Lately I've been finding things to occupy myself. Before my trip to Java, I had occupied myself with researching about the place. I spent hours and hours on the internet reading up on other travellers' experience and which places to go and which to avoid. I think I was researching too well that I was beginning to neglect Abg.

and I thought my restlessness would subside after having that trip. Nope, I was wrong. After a trip to KK and a week later, I was fidgeting once more. I wanted something to think about, a project I could keep myself busy with. Though I may appear sedate and calm on the outside, my mind is racing here and there and everywhere.

One moment last week I was determined to get a Nintendo Wii. I am not sure how that evolved into another trip overseas. I am like a bee that was buzzing all over the place and now have settled on a flower - for the time being, that is.

Abg is keeping his opinions to himself. I think he has learnt from the past that his wife does not like when people disagree with her. But I think sooner or later, Abg should put his feet down and say enough is enough. Sometimes I think my husband spoils me and I don't think that that is a good thing. What is weird though, is that even though I know it isn't a good thing, I would still make him go my way and he does. Surely there is a limit to his manoeuvrability.

Thursday, June 04, 2009

Small talk

I'm never very good at small talk.

Whenever I am in a situation where I am faced with spending some time with a stranger, I am more than happy to sit in silence and think about other stuff than making small talk. Perhaps other people are uncomfortable being in complete silence. Perhaps they find the lack of conversation unnerving, that they'd rather talk about mundane stuff that they will definitely forget in the next moment, rather than sit quietly.

Have you noticed the topics that often crop up during small talks? What do you do, where are you from, what does your husband do, how many children do you have...yadayadayada. Wouldn't it be interesting if, for instance, while waiting for a taxi, that the complete stranger says to you, Do you prefer KFC or McDonalds? Wouldn't THAT be a great conversation opener?

A few weeks ago I was in this situation. I was heading to KK for my conference and was in the plane with another MO whom I know by name only. He joined HRPZ's Ortho Department after I had left. He ended up sitting next to me. I smiled politely as I introduced myself and acknowledged him. Anyway, we were sitting at the airport waiting for our transport to take us to the hotel when he started asking me things about myself. I answered politely, with just enough information without being too chatty. I tend to do that when I am nervous, then you will find me yapping about my cats and how expensive litter is.

When people ask me how many kids I have and I answer none, I noticed that almost all will follow that answer with, "How long have you been married?". Why is that, I wonder? Maybe if my answer was "Oh, just recently", they will feel relieved that they had broached a potentially sensitive matter?

One other guy whom I was talking with while waiting for a court case came up with an unconventional response to my answer. He said, "Oh, don't worry. I only have one and have absolutely NO intention of having more!"

Anyway, I digress. After he asked me that and I gave my answer, I found myself adding, which sounded more like an afterthought, "I had a miscarriage last year" - and I am wondering now why at that time I felt compelled to explain my situation by divulging an information as personal as that.