How did I know..?

Someone asked me how I knew Abg was THE ONE the other day and I didn't have a ready answer at that time. Now, as I have pondered about it, I realise it's because it's not just one thing. It's a collection of things I observed and remembered about him during the course of our relationship.

I remember when he told me that on that night when he messaged me via ICQ, that he was so bored that he simply sent a message to a random person that caught his eye on the profile thingy. At first, I thought, wah, aku nie 'accident' je ke...but then I thought, that out of millions of people that he could have messaged, why did it end up to be me......hundreds and thousands of kilometres away in cold Belfast? and not only that, what were the chances that of all times I ignored other messages, that I felt compelled to reply to his?

I remember in the beginning he would send me forwarded emails that I would promptly ignore and I even later told him that I never bothered reading them so could he please stop? Our meetings in cyberspace at that time were mostly coincidental, mostly due to the time difference, I'm only online when he is about to go to bed and he never exhibited any interest to lay off his bedtime in order to chat with me. So, logik la kalau masa tu rasa macam dia tak berminat la kan...

I remember the things that he tells me but one which made me go 'awwww' was when he told me about being hit from behind by this car driven by this pakcik. He told me the pakcik looked so sorry that he told pakcik not to worry about the damage caused. When he admitted that he's never celebrated his birthday before, nor getting birthday presents, I promised myself that I will be that first person to do so. Later on, he would say that I am first in a lot of aspects in his life.....isn't that sweet?

I remember one day, we were chatting as usual, mostly about his work and my studies and other stuff when suddenly he said, 'I'm thinking about having a serious relationship with you'. Terkedu la jugak. Mind you, he still won't sleep late chatting despite having said that! :)

I remember arriving in my cold dorm room after a tiring 16 hour journey from KL to Belfast and had just sent him an SMS saying I had arrived. At that time I could send SMSes to him tapi not the other way round. I remember feeling so overjoyed when suddenly I received an SMS from him - kebetulan service providers had just recently allowed international SMSes. Selepas tu, melambung2 tinggi la perbelanjaan membayar phone credits....:)

I remember the day I realise that this man meant more to me than I ever let known when he nonchalantly told me about how his mother and elder sister wanted to set him up with this girl and antara sedar tak sedar I got so upset sampai nangis2 depan PC! Tak ke lawak....well, masa nie rasa lawak la...masa tu, rasa macam jantung turun ke kaki....! :)

I remember one time when we had one of our major disagreement and I implied that maybe we were better off seeing other people. He later told me, the next day he was so depressed that he couldn't concentrate during a meeting, which was even noted by the chairperson.

I remember, when I had started working, even after completing a 30 hour on call during my houseman days, the sight of him coming over for dinner completely rejuvenated me. He would listen patiently as I told him about the scoldings I had received, about feeling so tired I didn't have the energy to even eat and even just talking about it made it all feel a lot better.

I remember when I had to go back to KL, he would send me to the bus station and wait till the bus drove off before leaving. I remember the heaviness I felt in my heart as I left him.

and there are thousands more of "I remember"s over the past 5-6 years of us being together and all of those are part of the answer of how I knew whether Abg is THE ONE.

So, my answer is this,....you just know.....call it gut feeling, instinct, gerak hati, etc but only you will know....